Stress & Heart Disease

Chronic psychological stress, recent studies indicate, may be as important — and possibly more important — to the health of your heart than the traditional cardiac risk factors. In fact, in people with less-than-healthy hearts, mental stress trumps physical stress as a potential precipitant of fatal and nonfatal heart attacks and other cardiovascular events, according to the latest report.

How to Set Emotional Boundaries With a Narcissist

It is important to set boundaries with narcissists, such as setting limitations on behaviors and words. But emotional boundaries that block the incoming feelings of guilt and shame are also important. Victims of narcissistic abuse are often empaths and too easily take on the emotions of guilt and shame as a result of their childhood emotional abuse by parents or siblings who are narcissists.

Why does he abuse me? Stop asking this question!

Why does he abuse me? Stop asking this question! Victims of abusive and narcissistic relationships often ask “why does he abuse me?” They do this 1) because our primitive brains engage in pattern-finding for make sense of fear 2) trauma bonding 3) love bombing 4) self-blaming tendencies toward “fixing” the self 5) Victim blaming by the abuser 6) victims trained not to hold the abuser accountable

How to Support Grieving and Traumatized Teens

It can be difficult to know how to support grieving and traumatized teens following an event such as the gun violence episode at Oxford High School in Oxford, Michigan. I regularly see clients from this town, which has grown a lot in the past 10 years, but still...

Stop Explaining Yourself to a Narcissist

In parenting and relationships I’ve often given this advice: See how few words you can use to talk to the other person. Endless explaining is a power giveaway. If your narcissistic partner is not negotiating in good faith and seeking to understand your position, it really won’t matter how much you explain. Your attempts to make him understand you will never overcome his need to NOT understand you.

Do You Feel Guilty When You Don’t Feel Guilty?

Some people are so well practiced at feeling guilty that they feel guilty when they don’t feel guilty. What do I mean by this riddle?  Let’s consider a scenario of a young woman, Charlotte (fictionalized account) who has been estranged from her grandfather for years....